Friday, October 16, 2009

Blank screen - grey sky

Yes, fall is here, there is no denying it. And I admit a degree of frustration with my apparent inability to manage the emotional reaction to the steady downpour and endless clouds over the Bay. Perhaps I should have counted my 5 Graces first this morning...

I am tired, a little wrung out actually, like a slightly worn facecloth with the edges fraying. I have been on a long run for me, many days in a row being "on" in one arena or another and well, I ain't as young as I useta be. Which, of course, leads down a different tunnel with no cheese as my friend Charles would say.

Extranjera wrote a particularly moving piece this morning about a young woman taking her own life. Given the landscape of my life with precious young people around me who are challenged and still aware of all aspects of the world, this struck home and I am letting myself dwell for a short time on a bleak and less than optimistic horizon. I have discovered that resisting this feeling and pushing away the dark thoughts as unwelcome visitors only prolongs their stay. Life is cyclical by nature and on this very dull day, I am allowing myself to be at the bottom of my bounce.

I am confident in the rebound of the ball and when I close my eyes and allow the Power of the Universe to move through me, I can take a deep breath and move strongly into my day. The tone of the sky has warmed and the filtered light on the arbutus is glorious. The trunk where the bark has peeled away over the summer is bare, like skin and it glistens in the rain. It is still and quiet outside, the rain falls straight down onto a ground that welcomes the moisture and prepares for the resting time of autumn. Namaste.

No comments: